Parental favoritism and love are not the same thing. Your child feeling secure and safe enough to express a preference is most likely a reflection of good parenting, not the opposite.

Anxiety, untreated ADHD, depression, sleep issues, or other conditions such as autism and developmental delay can all be reasons for tantrums that are beyond what would be normal.

When your child has a tantrum, their primitive brain takes over: the amygdala and the hypothalamus. These trigger a fight-or-flight response, which is why you will see your child flush, breathe more heavily, and even sometimes have a racing heart during a tantrum. The only way to respond in these moments is to allow time, create connection, and give the body a chance to turn off that fight-or-flight response.

Many parents feel that tantrums cannot or should not happen when kids are as young as 12 months old, but it is actually fairly common.

Parents have several main jobs: to set limits, to create a safe space for our children, and to teach our children effective ways to manage the challenges and disappointments of life.